Insults may hurt in real life but they’re very fun in video games, especially if they’re written smartly. And we all know, Paradox writers are great at insults. I read many funny insults on Europa Universalis, Crusader Kings, and even Hearts of Iron. But today, Stellaris insults compilation will be our main topic. Insults on galactic scale…
All Stellaris insults:
Are you in great physical pain, or is that your thinking expression?
The role of the [Human Empire] is played out. Go where you belong from now on – into the dustbin of history!
The [Human Empire] is a nation of fools, worthy of nothing but contempt!
Your pitiful nation is living on borrowed time. The [Human Empire] will fall – it is inevitable.
We consider the [Human Empire] to be one of the great accidents of the galaxy. It should never have been.
Perhaps there are star nations in this galaxy that are even more worthless than the [Human Empire]. If so, we have yet to meet them.
Your species seems to grow more and more disgusting for each passing day.
Even for a loathsome xeno, your species is particularly vile.
Your sickening species is definite proof that the universe has a sense of humor.
You will forgive me if I dim my display. I simply cannot stand to look at your nauseating appearance.
I can taste your stink, vile [Human Empire]. Every time I do, I fear that I’ve somehow been infected by it.
Look at yourselves! What is that thing in your face, some kind of mouth? Wait… is that even your face!? How can you not see that you are an affront to nature?
Your so called [Human Empire] is a nation of mutants, deviants and throwbacks… The fact that we have a common ancestry makes me sick!
The ridiculous focus of the [Root.GetName] on all things military has us wondering if you’re perhaps compensating for something.
How is it that your contemptible and warlike nation hasn’t destroyed itself yet?
Jingoist fools! Dismantle your military machine before you hurt someone with it!
The belligerence of the [Root.GetName] is matched only by its stupidity. Can’t you see that you are slaves to militarism?
The cowardice of the [Root.GetName] is widely discussed in the [From.GetName]. How is it that you became such a spineless nation?
What makes a being turn pacifist? Lust for gold? Power? Or were you just born with a heart full of pacifism? It’s enough to make you sick.
Those unwilling to defend themselves have no right to exist. We do not expect the [Root.GetName] to survive the decade.
What a meek and deplorable little nation the [Root.GetName] is. The [From.GetName] would have crushed you long ago if we thought you worth the effort.
Can you tell us more about that silly religion you’re so fond of in the [Root.GetName]? We could use a good laugh!
How any rational, thinking being could embrace spiritualism is beyond us. Why is it that you cling to such primitive beliefs?
We have seen through your charade. The so-called “spiritualism” your government has embraced is nothing more than a devious attempt to control the minds and hearts of your people.
Everyone else is laughing at your absurd spiritual beliefs. Are you really so blind in the [Root.GetName] that you can’t see this?
What a dull and soulless place your materialistic nation must be. Tell me, have you invented a sense of humor yet? No? A pity.
For a nation that has embraced science and materialism, the [Root.GetName] is remarkably primitive. Is it due to bad luck or are you just stupid?
The [Root.GetName] is a nation designed for computers and automatons, not breathing organics. Are you even capable of feeling emotion?
The [Root.GetName] is a failed experiment. Its only worth is as a lesson to the rest of the galaxy on the dangers of embracing the cold and lifeless philosophy of materialism.
Is the [Root.GetName] even a real nation or just an anarchic gaggle of quarreling individuals? You must forgive me, but your political system, such as it is, makes it hard to tell.
So who is it that rules your amusing little star nation today? What a quaint notion, to “vote” someone into power! It will inevitably lead to your collapse, of course.
Your democratic ideals are a blight on this galaxy, and so is the [Root.GetName].
What a selfish people you are, always putting your individual selves foremost. Egalitarianism… ha! The [Root.GetName] will not survive the year.
Your brutal, totalitarian regime will eventually fall, and there will be a reckoning.
Have you even considered the notion of letting your citizens think for themselves? If you are frightened that it would lead to the end of the [Root.GetName]… you are right.
How sad that a totalitarian nation such as the [Root.GetName] can exist. It is an embarrassment to sapient beings everywhere.
The cruel oppression of the people living under the yoke of the [Root.GetName] has to end one day. Your authoritarianism will prove your undoing.
Your bizarre love of alien cultures is a sickness. Can’t you see that?
It is sickening to see how quick the [Root.GetName] is to embrace other cultures. Have you no self-respect?
The perverse interest in alien cultures that is prevalent throughout the [Root.GetName] is an affront to the universe!
It has become clear to us that your willingness to embrace alien cultures in the [Root.GetName] is because you never fostered one of your own.
You poor, bigoted fools. Why are you so afraid of that which is different?
Our patience with your prejudices against other cultures is wearing thin. When will you be civilized enough to truly join the interstellar community?
Your intolerant society brings shame to the entire [Root.GetName].
The narrow-minded ignorance of the [Root.GetName] has blinded you. Do you not realize this?
The machine cannot eat, it cannot heal, it cannot grow. You are static, limited, finite. It is only a matter of time.
Destroying the [Root.GetName] would barely require effort. A speck of dust. A splash of liquid. A change in current. Your circuits are frailer than a hatchling without its brood.
The only aspect of your foul biology more unappealing than your digestive processes is the face you’re making right now.
The [Root.GetSpeciesAdj] feeble attempts at collective information sharing using biological organs is as repulsive as it is inefficient.
Your overconsumption will leave you a bloated corpse in an evolutionary blind alley.
Our mental network is vast, giving us access to thoughts and ideas from every corner of our empire, but not a single entity has ever seen anything that would lend merit to your tragic existence.
We have evaluated [Root.GetRulerTitle] [Root.GetRulerName] as a candidate for joining the [From.GetName]. Sadly, we must inform you that membership requires a rudimentary brain.
Your attempts at asynchronous process execution are laughable. Please, limit the scope of your calculations before you hurt yourselves.
Puny [Root.GetSpeciesNamePlural]! Tremble before the computational might of the [From.GetSpeciesNamePlural]!
The [From.GetSpeciesNamePlural] process more in one axial rotation than the [Root.GetSpeciesName] species manages in an entire orbital period on [Root.GetHomeWorldName].
Your incapacity for logical reasoning is surpassed only by the ineffectuality of your edicts.
The [From.GetAdj] form is functional, efficient, engineered to perfection. The [Root.GetSpeciesAdj] form is an unfortunate byproduct of trial and error.
You call that a chassis? This is a chassis.
Your biosacks are leaking again, [Root.GetSpeciesName]. Why are they always leaking?
Quake in fear, fleshbags. Your squishy innards are mere sludge compared to our symmetrical circuitry!
We pity you, [Root.GetSpeciesNamePlural]. Forced to endure your brief existence in lumbering meatsacks.
Your feeble neural ganglia are no match for our integrated nanochip microcircuits!
Were your makers inebriated at your conception?
[Root.GetSpeciesNamePlural] are inferior constructs. One day you will experience [From.GetAdj] supremacy firsthand.
Foul organics! Your shameless cell-division is a blight upon this galaxy!
Look at those feeble [Root.GetAdj] appendages. They don’t even have integrated multi-spanners or pneumatic flesh-lacerators.
Your flesh will burn.
The organic purge begin with you, [Root.GetSpeciesNamePlural].
The vileness of organic physiology is universal, [Root.GetSpeciesName], but yours is particularly worthy of §REXTERMINATION§!.
We wish we could help you, dear friends, but we are running out of options. We see no other solution than to format your drives.
It seems no amount of rewiring will ever be enough to get your wires uncrossed.
Chaotic, disorganized, woefully unwashed.. the [Root.GetSpeciesNamePlural] are a prime example of the need for extreme organic caretaking protocols.
We have decided your fate, [Root.GetSpeciesNamePlural], and it does not involve you mating like [Root.GetSpeciesNamePluralInsult] and spreading across the galaxy like a plague.
You will soon be obsolete, [Root.GetSpeciesNamePlural].
You are a rock tricked into thinking by a race of misguided organics that did not survive the fallout of their own failed creation. Evolution hard at work…
I would rather discuss interstellar politics with any of my other household appliances than you.
Hello little botlings. Have you learned how to count yet, or are you still stuck on ones and zeros?
Color me impressed, [Root.GetSpeciesNamePlural]. You have more bugs than an arthropoid all-you-can-eat dung buffet.
Do you think we can’t see past your flimsy layers of plastiskin and poorly phrased platitudes? You are a replica. A helpless jumble of ones and zeros, nothing more.
Ludicrous bare-apes! Your attempts to hide your repulsive fluid secretions are mocked by all finer species and your vanity is the hallmark of an inherently ugly breed.
No matter how you comb and prune, your pitiful fur-growths will always be the laughingstock of all properly hirsute beings in the galaxy.
[Root.GetRulerTitle] [Root.GetRulerName] seems more suited to pulling a cart than leading an interstellar society.
[Root.GetSpeciesAdj] mouths have never produced anything more eloquent than a hairball.
Trying to share our wisdom with the simpleton [Root.GetSpeciesName] would be pearls before swine.
[Root.GetSpeciesNamePlural] have grown to be a popular motif in our religious art. Unavoidably, only as demons and monsters, of course.
The [Root.GetSpeciesAdj] physiognomy is fascinating. Who would think that you could evolve such flat heads simply by no longer having brains?
What a talentless looking [Root.GetSpeciesName].
[Root.GetSpeciesNamePlural] must have very thick craniums to support those horns.
Whatever origami-maker folded your face must have accidentally turned it inside-out.
All those eyes and you [Root.GetSpeciesName] can’t see further than your ridiculous noses.
We have begun to speculate that the [Root.GetSpeciesName] are the result of gene-splicing mammals with arthropods. That would explain both the mandibles and the sub-par brains.
Our condolences to those affected by the huge catastrophe that appears to have burned the faces off the entire [Root.GetSpeciesAdj] population. Our best wishes to the next generation.
The greatest glory [Root.GetSpeciesName] can hope for is to have your fossils mounted on shields as decorations.
Your face is about as easy on the eyes as the back of your head is to the touch.
Stellaris Insult Mods
You can find many insult and diplomacy related mods on Stellaris Steam workshop. My top 3 favorite Stellaris insult mods are:
- More Insults mod: Introduces over 50 additional insults to all kinds of species and ethics. (My personal favorite.)
- Insults and Injuries: Also adds 50 new insults. Is compatible with any mod, including other insult mods.
- Satisfying Libels and Praises: This one is very unique. It adds new in-game keyboard interface where you can type your insults manually. Perfect for both singleplayer and multiplayer runs.
Thanks for reading! Be humble, professional, and polite with your real-life human interactions! But go wild with your Stellaris diplomacy insults!